Now is the very worst time in living somewhere else. It's time to move again.
But this time it's multiplied for me because not only is it me moving, but my mom, who we've been living with for the last year, is moving too. She's lived here for 17 years in this house my parents built together as their dream house, and in this town since 1973. That's a long time. She's being great at giving away or selling or donating or throwing away stuff. She knows what she wants when she goes and that's it. It is hard for her, but she is doing it. And I am proud of her and thankful for all the help my brother and sister have been on their short visits.
But for me, each new area we go through is another death; another thing or time to mourn. Today we threw away my doll. I remember getting 'Lori Walker' and she was taller than I was. Now, 40 some odd years later, no one wants her. She was well loved and shows it. And I wish the velveteen rabbit story was really too, as my stuffed animals went today too. And I look on the shelf and our tinkertoys and Lincoln Logs are going. Little people, pull toys and jack-in-box are all headed out. And the memories of my childhood, my children's early childhood go with them.
We don't have enough room in our storage unit for me to keep everything I want to. Most of my books are gone. Clothes, toys, furniture - so many things. And I know they don't make me happy. But my memories are all tied up in those things. I know I should just take a picture. But no. It's not the same.
Can I keep our stilts? The rocking chair? Cookbooks? Maybe. How about my rock collection?
And the house won't be in the family.
And there will be no family in this city that I grew up in.
We are saying goodbye too. Our supporting churches are praying us off. Friends are having us to dinner or asking to meet somewhere. Goodbyes to people and places and things.
Chris leaves July 7. I leave with the kids in a month. We are almost down to just things we are taking with us back to Cameroon. Pictures are coming off the walls. Closets are empty. It is a sad time.
And what awaits in Cameroon? Friends and a lot of unknowns. We are changing houses. Ben starts at a new-to-him school, Rainforest International School. Kristin begins high school, Noah is over 6 ft tall. Chris has a new position in addition to his old responsibilities. I've been asked to mentor 2 new teachers and teach 3-4th grade one day a week. I'll be in 2 libraries volunteering, and helping out with HR a little bit. We will need more help at home because I won't be there as much.
My closest friend in Cameroon has left after her 3 year term was up. Other friends have left and we will need to make new friends.
The good things happening are friends, family and memories.
The bad things are fighting over things like a bed frame. Being exhausted. Dealing with feelings of loss. Saying goodbye again. Trying to remember details. Trying to be kind to mom while she deals with loss in her own way.
We have already had a yardsale, done craiglsist and online sales, and emotionally, I can't handle any more. I am spent. I want escape.
But do I trust God in the hard times and the good times? Do I really believe He is here and will take care of me? Do I believe He knew all this before the beginning of time? Absolutely. SO although today is hard, this is not forever. He is with me, though I stumble and fall, He will never leave me nor forsake me. I can always trust Him.
Pray for us and all your missionary friends in their time of transition.
We are all longing for our true home.
And what we've been up to in May and June...
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| My niece Emily gave us a tour of NC State |
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| Betsy graduated |
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| Bookshelves emptied and sold |
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| All 3 kids are on swim team. Swim F.A.S.T! |
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| I got to pay a lot of money to show I don't have breast cancer |
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| Friends came for dinner |
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| Visit to JAARS and our friends the Myers family |
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| The helicopter headed to Cameroon. |
We went to the Gassler family reunion in Tennessee!
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| Cool t-shirts |
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| hanging with the to out-laws at the ball game |
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| The patriarch |
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| air guitar |
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| Quick trip to DC |
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| Volunteering at VBS |
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| My sister and her kids came to visit. |
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| Reunion of Youth Group from RPC |
There is more, but that's all for now.
Thanks for reading and praying.
Pray requests:
Pray for everyone in this stressful transition time! Chris flies on July 7. He stops in England to teach a workshop on Arts for A Better Future, and then in Ireland to go to a conference. I fly with the kids on July 28th. We'll head straight for Cameroon. We are moving to a different house, about 2 blocks from our last apartment. Chris will have new responsibilities as Scripture Engagement coordinator, and I'll be a mentor for 2 new teachers at the elementary school and teaching one day a week in a 3-4th grade classroom. I'll also be helping with HR and in the library at both schools. I think I'm tired just thinking about it! Please pray for an easy transition, good goodbyes, new friends for the kids, safe journeys and all our luggage to arrive with us.
